~A New GOAL~

It was quite a time since I last post a blog. Time flies in just a few blink of eyes. I am now into my 4th year of study, which is phase IIIB. I can hardly believe that I am going to graduate very soon! Though it will be year 2011... Haha... I consider it fast because all those tough examination "drag" my view on years of studying medicine.

Since I knew that I passed my phase IIIA examination, as well as all four of my close friends passed along with me, I am so relieved. ALthough I did not felt much excitement, I just knew that I had dumped away the heavy stone within me which had bother for weeks. I carried on. What else do you expect me to? I went home, being a tour guide to my "sisters" back in my hometown; attended my buddy's convocation dinner; my second college's seniors' convocation dinner; and lastly, enjoyed myself to the fullest in Bali Island for 4 days.

There, we 3 girls with Sharen as the leader most of the time, backpacking mostly at Kuta Beach. I guess, I gotta post another blog on my tour in Bali. Hehe... Too long a story.

By the time I came back, I only had a day to rest. Then my minor posting began, which is Anaesthesiology. Now that the first week of the posting had passed, I guess I enjoyed it although I was obviously tired mentally as well as physically. I had stopped practising my yoga for weeks now. Everyday in this week was so packed the schedule. However, now that I found CH as my partner to ward, I am able to find myself enjoying the posting. We had little to study, basically only lecture notes, but we spend our time inside the OT and becoming the observers besides getting the practical knowledge from those experience MO.

I am so thankful that I had met few good and kind doctors during this posting. Especially I had some interest in it even before I get into my clinical years. Dr. Vasanthan, Dr. Loo, Dr. LeeMF, Prof.Gracie, Prof YKChan had succcessfully increase the depth of my interest into the field. However, there is still a long long way for me to go before I can decide to follow the route they introduce to me. Yet, a GOOD beginning is always important, right? They make me feel that Anaes is interesting and fun and crucial in order to sustain life in different aspects. As a human, every body has the right to be pain-free. So here is the role of analgesia and anasesthesia. As a matter of fact, I even realise that many patients and procedures depending on it, without me realising it much earlier. I bet many people don't as well. In contrast, I am quite ashamed that I had forgotten all my physiology and pharmacology that I had learnt during my first and socond year. Well, on the bright side is, I still have the chance to revise it as much as I could, because the advantages of me being still a medical student (MS) after all!

Besides that, sit-down talks with Prof. Chan and Dr. V had me open my eyes to a few things in LIFE. Because that is what I always bother about. LIFE.

Prof. Chan gave me a quotes for me to hold-on, as she came to it by experience, which is 4L and 3e.

LIVE, LEARNING, LOVE, LEGACY, ENTHUSIASM, ENERGITIC, AND ... EXPECTATION

On the other hand, Dr. V had advised both of us that the learning time for MS is not only during office hours. THe longer you stay in the ward, the more you learn. Because nowadays experience of a doctor the society expecting is based on skills on the practical aspects. Knowledge alone from the text books is inadequate. This makes me more motivated to go to ward more frequently. Luckily, CH is a hard-working student, as compared to a much more lazy me.. Hence, I have a friend who is able to push me to be more hard-working, why not? ALthough I have to sacrifice the time for being able to laze around even during the weekend! hoho....

After the experience I had in Emergency Department today, I found that there's too many things that I don't know. Especially in an emergency setting, I found myself standing there do not know what to do. I was stunted. Do not know where to begin with. I was asked to set IV line, yet I can't find a proper vein. At least I was able to take blood sample.

Haih...everything comes with practice! undeniably!!!

I told myself from now on, I have to study smart and practice more. Be more confident and more calm. I mean, not that I had study stupid for the past years, but now that I have less and less time to revise everything from the beginning... I know that I always been telling myself to be confident and calm, yet, I still couldn't handle it well. I always think too much that I can't make decision well but only wasting precious time thinking and considering.

I know, everything comes with practice and experience. Again and again~~

~YO~

~Exam Finale Phase IIIA~

HOrrible, Terrible, Vegetable!!!

Although the time spent in Klang for approximately 10 months there were splendidly nice and beautiful, it ended with more than a month of torturing moments...

HOwever, I never with I can turn back time. I love all those memories in Klang. Freedom, fun and new experiences. There, I only have to bear with myself and my coursemates. Basically, I spent most of the time with my groupmates. They are all really fun and adorable! Each and everyone has their own characteristic and attitudes. Though, not all that I like.. But, humans are born not to be perfect right>? So do I. It is quite hard to imagine that with my groupmates, I had storage photos with them of more than 5 gigabytes! Increadible huh? Well, some include taking photos of food stuff and some scenary views. Nonetheless, it was still quite an amount, don't you think so? So nice. I really hope my friendship with my groupmates will maintained good even though we go back to UM and again, being separated into different smalll groups. More over, I'll only meet and see my coursemates everyday, although kinda boring, but still, no responsibility holds. Free!!! just 38 sometimes, as a few couples were born there. ><

On the other hand, there were moments of ups and downs in my life over there as well. Times that I need to struggle with studies and some "stupid stuff". LUckily I had already got over it, although it took me quite some time. Whatever... Some was just my own wild imagination. worthless to mention it anyway! ><

Not to forget a few young doctor HO that I got to know in Klang hospital, I miss them!

They were so nice to me. I learnt a lot from them indeed. Maybe those were just trivial stuff, but to me as a new fresh medical student, it was exciting! I loves clinical experiences. It is always fun and exciting. This is because every patient presented to you is totally different human being with different behavior and different complaints. This complicate our diagnosis. But that is the challeging part that I love! I never deny that studying and in the effort of absorbing all those information of diseases into my tiny useless brain is an ultimate level 100 difficulty task --> It just happened after nights of burning midnight oils. In another word, hard work. I am so much more indulge in my books and notes compared to my own first and second year studies. I am more dedicated and interested. Well, it is the clinical part that i like. *wink wink*

Time flies, so fast that I don't realise that I lose it. Just a few blinks and laughters ends my joyful moments there. I found myself began thinking of those horrible facts of passing final examination of phase IIIA. I scared as I saw a senior who seemed to be so much hardworking failed and had to repeat the whole phase IIIA in Klang. I mean, not to discriminate her, but it is a fact of life that each and everyone of us who are still in Phase IIIA should know. Passing is no JOKE! After rounds and rounds of eavesdropping, PASSING is not hard yet no simple. Paper 1&2 are basically testing ur memory capacity as well as knowlegde; Paper 3=OSCE is a paper that require your adrenaline shoots to the level of making you sweats and running all the way from station 17 to station 1! funny huh? running like wild babies without knowing what comes next in the exam hall... Lolx..><; Paper4 = long case presentation. This had put so much tense to my roomie, although my exam was earlier,but she seemed to be much tense compared to myself. I don't know why. Erm...among all the papers, OSCE is the one I frightened most! May god bless all of us.... Nam mo Amitabha....

Oh yeah, forgotten to mention, in mid of preparing our finals, my whole batch were forced to move back to UM 6th college just 2 weeks before examination. Imagine, I had to pack everything up and unpack everything in 2 days. Tiring and exhausting. Wasted 2 days for not being able to concentrate well to study. I don't blame, just lamenting....><

Exam week passed by in just blinks of eyes. Sour and bitter taste that most of us had was after OSCE paper. So difficult and so unexpected. What to do? WHo ask me not to be more hardworking during first and second year? even third year in Klang??? Play and jolly too much dy!

Another painful part is the period of waiting for result. This is the first time in my life that I stayed back in college "lepak'ing" just for that purpose. The previous 2 years, i just packed myself up in the last day of exam and runned back home. Never look back. However, this time, I waited. So as most of my batchmates. We're all too frightened to go home.

Last but not least, I wish everyone pass smoothly. Not to mention some maybe with distinction. But not to be greeedy right? Just be happy and contented with what I possess right now. My eyelids almost shut now....sleeping time!

night night!